Resurrection

May 14th, 2012 I asked God to resurrect my son, Jaxson.

May 15th, 2012 Jax was stillborn and I held his 1lb body in my arms. 

God did not resurrect his flesh like we asked.

6 days ago a 2 year old little girl died suddenly in her sleep and her Bethel worship-leader parents asked their church to stand with them to ask God to resurrect her.

The subsequent days of praying, worshiping, posting on social media and fundraising by Bethel have grabbed my attention and I've watched and read the unfolding of the story as it's gained traction on the internet. 

Can God resurrect this little girl?  I believe 100% can CAN.  I don't believe he will. And not because I'm jaded that God didn't answer my request to revive Jaxson.  But because I've come into more fully formed beliefs about eternity over the years.

There are 2 kinds of resurrection mentioned in scripture by Jesus: an earthly resurrection like that of Jarius' daughter and Lazarus.  Jesus raised them for his own purposes, to verify his power, and glorify his Father.  The other is an eternal resurrection: when the dead in Christ are raised to life and we rule and reign with him for eternity in the New Jerusalem on a remade earth.

I know the devastation of the abrupt loss of a child and subsequent grief that wrecks your days.  I know the heart cry that bursts forth begging God to change it.  I know the big faith it takes to ask God for something impossible and even bigger faith to believe He will do it. 

But I also know God doesn't generally respond when we back him into a corner and demand that he prove himself. You can't just put on a big worship conference, blast the prayer request all over social media and think God HAS to come through for you because of your giant faith. Don't get me wrong, I wholeheartedly believe this family honestly wanted to ask God for a miracle and asked their church family to stand with them in prayer.  THAT IS FINE.  But they happen to attend a megachurch with a feverish following online and frankly, their grief is being turned into a circus.  Real people are going to be affected by the non-resurrection of this little girl.  Not just the hurting family who won't get her back but the thousands of people with shallow faith following the cult-like behavior of Bethel who will undoubtedly call into question God's goodness by his refusal.

 The blindspot I see while everyone keeps asking for her resurrection SIX DAYS after she died is that SHE HAS ALREADY TASTED RESURRECTION! She is with Jesus!  Would YOU want to come back to earth after tasting the goodness of Jesus' presence?  Me neither.

Let's please remember: Jaxson's perfectly remade body was dancing with Jesus when we scattered his earthly ashes at Mt Rainier.  And one day, Ken and Liv and I will join him.  We wish we had him now and I will never not wish he had stayed with us; that God had preserved his life or intervened or even resurrected.  But God didn't.  And I don't blame him for that.  He is Sovereign and despite Pastor Bill Johnson's claims that not all die in God's timing (that's just outright heresy) no one lives or dies without God's input.

The bigger point is that we have no mind to conceive of eternity.  This life is so short lived...life without Jax. And I'm not looking forward to some fluff pink cloud heaven with harps and streets of gold...because heaven wasn't made for us humans.  This earth was.  So one day it will be remade and Jesus will be WITH us and we will experience with Jaxson EVERYTHING we missed on this side of eternity. We will get to make all of that lost time up.  Because when God rights a wrong he does it well.  The wrong is this fallen earth: but He redeems!

I believed in resurrection. I still do. But I'll take the eternal kind over the temporal every single time.  I weep for this family.  I've walked their road.  And I can say with confidence that God will walk with them through the pain and redeem this loss.  I really wish their pastor would tell them this. 

Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,” for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.  I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband.  And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God.  ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” Rev 21: 1-5

Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” John 11:25-26